Lately, it seems like every single day I am getting closer to figuring out life and people and why things are the way they are. Now obviously , I will not figure everything out but I have come to terms with life and we came to an agreement that I will take what it gives me, keep the positive and let go of the negative.
Life seems much more enjoyable and I have more of a positive attitude about the unknown. I usually obsess about things I think are happening (well let's just call it what it is, paranoia) or the unknown destination of my life. I used to say I would relax and enjoy things more if I knew what was going to happen.
I don't feel that way anymore.
Being a mother, student, full time employee, daughter, girlfriend is hard and things are always unknown. I never know what to expect from one day to the next with any role I take. Nothing is ever constant except my love for my daughter and that even grows more everyday. If I really knew what was going to happen I would never be suprised I would never see people for who they are, what they really do...their character.
I don't wanna know.
I won't worry and consume myself with the why and how.
It is what it is and people and things do what they do.
This is life..I don't wanna waste it on those things.
So, I wanted to document my truce with paranoia and fear. I 'm going to enjoy myself...no matter what.
1 comment:
I thought about this today when I was having a crappy afternoon. I accidentally erased something at work that made someone mad. then I left work and some dude almost pulled out infront of me, until i laid on the horn, slammed on the brakes and swerved by his piece of shit car...only to have him honk back like i did something wrong. I was pretty mad at the day. then I thought about you. and thought about you telling me about letting go of the negatives and the unknowns. all of the sudden things got better. i breathed deep, let it go, and immediately felt better. thanks miss celeste ;)
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